My eleven year old kitty is continuously finding new ways to endear herself to me. Whether it's strategicly coughing up a hairball onto the shirt I plan to wear the next morning, or waking me in the middle of the night with her "hunter's cry" (she'll howl incessantly until I go and brag on her for "killing" the little stuffed frog I bought her), she never ceases to bring a smile to my face.

Her newest little quirk is refusing to drink from anything but the bathroom sink. I got this cute little shot a while back:

Now, isn't that just adoreable?? Wait.... want to see it from another angle?

Awwww. SO cute.

Yeah, it was cute for about the first two weeks. Now it's just a big fat pain in the ass. Fresh bowl of water? Doesn't matter. Unless it's running from the faucet, she won't touch it. Running late for work? TOO BAD. Her ass won't let you get in front of the mirror until she drinks her fill.

Yeah, yeah.... I know. Just ignore her, right? RIGHT. Try ignoring this: Mau. Mau. MAU. MAU. MAU. MAAAAAU. MAAAAU.

Yeah, doesn't work for me either.

Now, to top it off, I've discovered that she's started knocking things off the sink in the hopes that it will bring me running. (Actually, this act in itself is nothing new... there's nothing like waking up in the middle of the night to hear scoot scoot scoot and know that you have exactly 5 seconds to get up and grab that glass of water left on the dresser before she knocks it to the ground.)

So, I'll get to the bathroom in the morning to find her sitting on the sink, with either my deoderant or a makeup brush lying on the floor.

Mau.

Mau.

MAU.

"FINE! God!" And the faucet comes on.

The final straw came on Monday.

I had an all-day sales training session that I was leading, and I needed to get to the hotel by 6:45am. Now, anyone who knows me already knows that that in itself is quite a challenge, but I was on a roll. I dragged myself out of bed at 6 and was rearing to go.

Wait. Where are my contacts?

No. Fucking. Way.

That's right, folks. On the floor. Upside-down. And... not JUST upside-down. The top to my left lens had somehow come open.

The left contact? Gone. The right contact? Dry as a bone from sitting upside-down. A backup pair? Didn't have any. Glasses? No fucking way! The pair I wear at home is literally held together with a piece of thread where the screw once was. Not gonna happen at a training with 40 gorgeous (and therefore, naturally, married) sales reps.

The solution was to soak the right one for half an hour and get it pasted onto my eyeball, and then go the entire day with only one lens in. For a girl with 2200/2400 vision, this was not extremely condusive to having a good day.

I know that I looked like I was on drugs. By mid-day both eyes were bloodshot, and I could never look directly AT someone, just sort of through them. Depth perception was also a problem, and I was constantly grabbing at things to keep my balance or to get my bearings.

All in all, that cute little "quirk" of hers ended up costing me about $300, a massive headache, and a near-collision on the drive home that night.

So now she can sit up there and cry until the cows come home. There's fresh water in her bowl, and there's not a damn thing wrong with it. I'll be damned if I'm going to enable this little fixation of hers. Go ahead, Georgie.... dry up for all I care.

And for any of you who actually believe that, I've got two words for you.

Suck. Er.

Just like me.

---

It seems the only time I have lately to make an entry is while sitting on a plane. I'm currently on my way to Miami, and Kristine is on this flight too, only she's in coach.

Bwah ha ha ha!!

Heh, just kidding. Sort of.

Seriously, that's the only benefit of traveling so much - at some point you start getting hand-written notes from some guy at Continental, and you're nearly always upgraded to first class.

Anyway, this trip will be a nice little break from the trips I've had over the past month. I'm actually not personally responsible for anything. I just need to show up, look pretty, and do some schmoozing. I'm sure Carl would prefer to think that I have a more professional outlook on this meeting, but right now I'm so burnt out he's lucky I'm showing up to the lectures in anything more than a swim suit.

After this, only two more weeks until I get to go home to Memphis! I haven't seen my friends or family since Christmas, so I'm really looking forward to it. Then, just a week after that, I get to meet Erika in Ft. Lauderdale. Any male who wants to get his ass grabbed on the dance floor, make your way on down there!

I'll be the one telling Erika to keep her hands to herself. Hee!

feeling... is anyone surprised that it's raining here?
reading... me talk pretty one day --david sedaris
miss something?
goodbye my friend - 2005-04-29
out of the loop - 2005-04-09
a quest for clarity - part 1 - 2004-08-30
no plan for a sequel - 2004-08-27
slacker of the month - 2004-08-26